The following narrative is the last 9 chapters of the book “unSpiritual: A Spiritual Journey “. It is being published here (link to next chapter at bottom) for those who would like to read, exclusively, Zzenn’s kundalini “Stairway to Heaven” narrative without the back story. Refer to the original volume for the whole story and all 19 Insight Keys.
The Entire Book – unSpiritual: A Spiritual Journey $16.95
The Exclusive Kindle Version – Kundalini: Triggered by a Famous Song $6.99
BEARER OF KUNDALINI – PART 8
There’s a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
‘Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook, there’s a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.
― Led Zeppelin IV (1971) ―
The following day I asked Duncan “what next?” and he paused, uttered hm, and walked over to the lawn chair to bask in the sun. I took this silent answer as a nudge to turn the question inward. Asking Duncan was just fun to do, usually instigated by that mischievous little devil, the muse.
Maybe the most humorous thing about this experience was that it was imperative, sort of like a duty, to have fun. I would start focusing on the bills that were due (balancing rational with fantastical) and my felt-sense would clearly indicate 1) check all due dates and 2) only pay the one bill that is due now, and 3) get on with doing something fun. Putting my feet in the mud was apparently just as, if not more important, than work, taxes, bills and annoying distractions. Being alive took priority.
So, I felt to wander to the Merlin statue near a coffee shop in Sedona. I decided it was safe to take the car since Duncan wasn’t accompanying me. I figured if I crashed or let it roll down a hill, having no passengers would lessen the consequences.
Derived from the Welsh name Myrddin, Merlin is a legendary figure best known as the wizard featured in Arthurian legend. This sculpture depicted him as a druid shaman warrior with a dragon like staff and a fish like harp. It was a fantastic rendition of the great bard, emanating the animal powers of nature. I spent some time studying every detail on this amazing sculpture until I had absorbed enough; it was like drinking knowledge with my eyes.
Next, I entered the coffee shop and took a seat near the door. As my eyes floated aimlessly around they became fixated on a sign outside the window. It said:
It was positioned on a wall to the right of the adjacent restaurant but there were restaurants on each side. Again, the Magickal path is all about perception, imagination and wonderment, so the sign may not have appeared misleading to others; even so, from my position it looked quite odd, like words with two meanings.
Then I noticed, in line with the outside sign, a bust of a man holding a child right in front of me. “Hm, this was interesting,” I hadn’t noticed the bronze statue when I sat down.
The name of the stature was The Way of the Warrior by John Soderberg, a renowned sculptor and exceptional humanitarian. As he states on his website:
“One of the most crucial human qualities, I believe, is empathy. Given empathy, brutality becomes impossible. Empathy is at the heart of our humanity, and in fact is the heart of our humanity, for it reduces the barriers of race, religion, and creed to items of mild interest, while unlocking our true, inherent human dignity.”
Here is the description of the statue:
The child in the sculpture is a portrait of a little girl who was found near death, abandoned in a warehouse. She was brought to the Rancho Feliz orphanage, where she was saved and adopted into a good family.
The warrior holding her represents the strength and courage required to lift someone up rather than knock them down. The warrior represents strength through responsibility and action by looking out for those in genuine need who cannot help themselves.
The book in the warrior’s right hand symbolizes the education and opportunity offered by service-workers to lift the child up and out of her inherited cycle and prison of hopelessness. The teddy bear symbolizes love and compassion. The design on the warrior’s T-shirt is the Tibetan Knot of Eternity ― an age-old symbol representing the inter-connectedness or inter-weaving of all humanity. The ever-watchful eyes on the back of his vest represent his awareness of the need of less fortunate others. The doll the child gives back to the warrior represents the spiritual rewards and growth we receive as we give.
In much of the places Rancho Feliz does its service, a poor child’s doll is made by wrapping a ball of newspaper with a rag, then tying a string around its neck. John Soderberg added wings to the doll ― symbolizing a broken-winged angel. The child gives back all she owns in this world. We receive with gratitude.21
I had been talking about donating proceeds from the ZzennSong project to a child abuse organization for weeks and, being a survivor myself, I felt a deep affinity for this bronze piece.
After studying the many meaningful details of this statue I was struck with overwhelming gratitude for people like John Soderberg and Alice Miller who dedicate their lives to true service to humanity, raising awareness on the one subject that really matters ― the Child ― for the child becomes the adult and the adult becomes the parent and member of society.
I decided to follow the line of sight of the stature and sign to the other side where a table and chairs sat under a tree. When I reached the table there were two clay objects there. Oddly, a perfectly crafted clay penis and vagina about two inches in size lay there as if abandoned or waiting for me to find them. One of the things about the Kundalini energy is that it’s deeply connected to sexuality which is connected to pleasure and childbirth. As I sat there pondering the significance of such a strange find I looked up and saw the sign of John Soderberg’s gallery. Interesting, I walked up to look through the window and out came John for a smoke break.
I introduced myself and asked permission to sit with him for a bit. I told him about ZzennSong and that one day I would like to raise money through the music project and donate to a real child abuse organization; one that goes into the trenches and gets their hands dirty. I told him his Way of the Warrior statue led me to him.
John quietly listened and after an exchange of ideas, he gave me the name of the child abuse organization he was a part of: Rancho Feliz Charitable Foundation, Inc.22
I knew little of John’s humanitarian history at the time but I later learned of his lifetime support. I was dearly humbled by his presence. I bid John goodbye and decided I would support his cause through ZzennSong if it generates profits in the future. I proceeded home to put my feet in the mud; that being a daily necessity to ground the current. The energy was still blazing out the top of my head like a blowtorch and it was everything I could do to not let me head rotate in spirals in public.
The next day I sat at the breakfast nook as usual exchanging insights with the elfin tribe when I saw a replay of Tim’s face telling me to go to Midgley Bridge. I was wondering when that part of the adventure would happen and now was the time.
As I drove through uptown Sedona on the way to the canyon the haunting smell of burnt trees filled the air. Mary, my friend who comforted me during the early stages of the energy release, had a Native American shop on the strip. So, I considered popping in to say hello.
As I drove into uptown, the lyrics from Stairway to Heaven that I was playing through the Bluetooth device, came loud and clear:
There’s a lady who’s sure all that glitters is gold
And she’s buying a stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she’s buying a stairway to heaven.
― Led Zeppelin IV (1971) ―
The moment I heard “if the stores are all closed” I noticed that ALL the stores in uptown were closed! Huh? I mean, I knew I had a weird relationship to the song but this was entering epic proportions. Mary was marketing glittery Native American trinkets, there were rings of smoke in the canyon and the stores were all closed the Kundalini had burst during the song ― these being just a few synchronicities in a long line too numerous to recount here. What are the chances of a full Kundalini release happening with a specific song at a specific time with so many connections? I think it lends an ear to the power of perception and meaning that humans can experience through their Bio-Imagination.
It is living true human art ― the kind all art points to. It’s one thing to create art about the human experience and another to be and live your life as art; coloring your experiences with artistic perception. Isn’t that what the Bio-Imagination is all about? A juicy life experience? Yes!
I reassured myself that this was pure coincidence externally (patternicity, apophenia) but true uncut synchronicity and Magick internally (perception). In other words, somehow, my life had unfolded with this song in a purely metaphorical experience impossible to dismiss; one that was about to culminate at Midgley Bridge.
As I drove through, staring at Mary’s shop and the ghost town of stores, I felt the presence of the dragon. I reflected on the dangerous initiation I survived thus far and how old things had been devastated by the fire of Shakti. Slowly I breathed, as the car cut through the smoky mist heading toward the bridge.
After parking topside, I entered the trail heading down toward the creek which was at the bottom of the bridge. As if out of nowhere, two women appeared behind me and followed down the trail. Odd creatures these two, sniffing flowers and not talking. Their silence was curiously inviting.
As I walked further down the trail they would separate and move together like butterflies saying nothing but motioning with their hands. At the bottom I meandered toward the bridge and got lost in an area of high brush. I looked around and could not see the bridge. Strange, it was just there. I was following the creek to go under the bridge but it was nowhere visible.
Baffled by my predicament, I walked back up the path to ask someone where that bridge was. Just ahead, one of the women were sitting on a rock resting. Perfect, I walked up to her and asked, “Excuse me, have you seen the bridge?” Instantly, I heard the song The Crunge playing in my head:
Excuse me, oh will you excuse me?
I’m just trying to find the bridge …
Has anybody seen the bridge?
Have you seen the bridge?
I ain’t seen the bridge!
Where’s that confounded bridge?
― Houses of the Holy (1973) ―
“Ok, ok, I get it. I’m having a psycho Led Zeppelin haunting” I thought to myself. “I’m possessed by the lyrics of Zep.”
Just then she pointed straight up behind my head. I turned around and poof, the bridge appeared in all its glory. Wow, what a weird trip, it’s not like that bridge is small. I then realized she was deaf and her friend too and I thanked her for pointing the way.
Just as Tim had suggested, I walked under the bridge and through to an unknown path. Living in Sedona 18 years, I had not explored this trail so I was excited to see where it went.
As soon as I passed under the bridge I felt a psychodrama coming on. It was like I had entered an alternate dimension. The feeling of an initiation experience creeped in like a mist from all sides.
“Oh boy,” I thought to myself, as a vision of clouds passing by a full moon crossed my awareness. “What next?” “Do I have to climb to a mountain top like Page did in the Song Remains the Same movie?” This was an unsettling thought because I wasn’t the bravest soul in the wilderness at night. Fortunately, a night hike was not going to be required.
As I started climbing up the rocks, visions of Page climbing the mountain in the movie began flashing in my mind. It wasn’t like I planned any of this, it just happened as I walked. Somehow I had entered into the scene of the movie.
Interestingly, this scene is where Jimmy Page ascends a mountain to meet the Hermit of the tarot cards. Once he reaches the top, he discovers that the Hermit is himself, and a sequence commences. The face of the Hermit slowly transforms back in time, from adulthood to childhood to a fetus in the womb and then reverses back in sequence to present time. Page then reaches out toward the Hermit and falls from the cliff edge. The Hermit waves a sword through the air creating rainbow trails from left to right as the song crescendo’s into an orgasmic mix of sounds.
The Hermit represents the search for truth and wisdom and the mountain leading up to him represents the Stairway to Heaven or enlightenment.
This universal theme was biologically being played out apparently without my volitional consent or forethought. In other words, the scene in the movie was not the conscious reason for the hike. I literally was in the dark as to where or what I was doing, I just walked and scenes unfolded in real time with each step.
When I got to the top of the plateau, the trail ended just ahead except for a tall stick leaning against the red rocks leading up to another plateau. “hm,” I pondered. “Is this the end of the trail or further?” Immediately I got ― further!
As I approached the large stick I noticed it had stubs on it for hikers to climb to the next level. Interesting, but it looked like an awkward challenge. Even so, up I went.
I got up on the stick and soon realized that this was not going to be easy. The further I climbed, the more risk I took of falling back on solid rock. There was nothing to hold onto but the stick until I got to the top and even then, there was a chasm to traverse from stick to cliff edge.
And why was I doing this? Wasn’t sure, I just knew I had to keep climbing. When I got to the top I tried every possible angle to navigate from stick to rock. I was on the top of a tall tree branch, falling would mean certain injury, and the only way to get to the top was on this stick.
I continued to struggle, reaching and positioning, stretching and grasping while toggling the destination and the rock below. There had to be a way to get to the top. Finally, I reached out my hand in total surrender and broke in tears.
Something had happened. The scene of Page falling from the mountain top at the feet of the Hermit flashed before me. There was no way I was going to make it to the next level without a helping hand from the Hermit. And with that pure revelation, I let out a breath and surrendered to the impossible.
I had come so far on the spiritual path and finally reached the end. This signified my limits and the power of Magick beyond my control. I had proved to myself I had given ALL on my life path, and in this moment, that the Hermit would take the reins from here on out.
Exhausted, I worked my way back to the ground feeling a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Zzenn had superpowers for sure but also limits; this was an important insight for the new me.
When I got to the bottom I sat in the shade reflecting on the revelation basking in the profound feeling of release. With a new sense of beginning I resumed the return path.
Then, as I neared the bridge, returning in through the outdoor, I pulled my walking stick from the back of my hiking pack for the trek back on solid dirt. When I did this, my left arm started waving it just like the Hermit did on the top of the hill.
I remember watching my arm as if it had a mind of its own, and actually, it did. After experiencing my body go through so many crazy transitions this was no surprise. I turned my face to the sun while my arm waved rainbow colors into the air with the imagined sword. In that moment I realized I had literally embodied the myth ― I had become the Hermit.
Along the return path I sat by the brook under a tree and listened to the songbirds sing while red dragonfly’s danced to the reflection of sunlight on the water. The crystal blue stream revealed rich emerald green moss covering boulders nestled between rocks. The magic of nature had unfolded with mystifying beauty and wonder. This was the gift at the end of a long road; a moment of true bliss, harmony and beauty destined to live forever in my heart.
After absorbing every sound and texture, the feeling of staying gave way to leaving when the two deaf women wandered nearby. They were heading back up the path so I took that as a signal to return home.
When we got to the top of the hill, the women motioned to have their picture taken and I obliged. They had wandered nearby on the way down, pointing out the bridge, and maintained a strange closeness on the way up as if guides or angels. After they handed me the camera they positioned themselves in front of an epic view and looked me straight in the eyes with their thumbs up in gleeful excitement.
For a moment I wondered if they had some inside knowledge on what I had just gone through. It was really weird how much of a congratulating presence they gave off. Maybe they felt our close proximity hike was to be celebrated. Even so, I couldn’t help but soak in the joy of the moment. It was a celebration of life and the end of a long journey.
The 18th Key: You are being lived.
You are “feeling in motion via the heart beat and breath.” The man or woman who says they feel nothing is feeling nothing. Humans are like flowers that can’t be force to grow or change. Only by realizing you are being lived through spontaneous feeling and “Thoughting,” does true conscious organic change happen. Forcing, through mental constructs (belief, identification) only serves to suppress feeling and cover up the messages of the unconscious. True power comes from the felt-sense and is the first step toward authenticity, bio-spirituality and a life of Magick.